Swallow it hard

Everytime u talk or praise about other guys.. or go out with other guys. I can feel my heart sinks. I acted cool.. I acted like it shouldnt matter to me that much, treated like we should be fair and I should not be sad when you date other guys.. but i cant help myself from feeling sad and keep thinking why isnt the guy be me.. why isnt me that you gave a chance, without thinking our friendship. No matter how much i scolded myself for being stupid and naive, i still fall deeper into the pit. Jay chou concert.. jewel box. demsey hill.. how i wish im the one who bring you to all these places..