Wooo! Finally exam has ended! I have been studying like a dog. Not going home for 2 weeks makes me homesick. Not that i like to stay at home, but the feeling of trapping in one place and eating the same old food totally sucks. Anyway I think overall the exams were alright, just that I'm afraid of maths after ive found out some careless mistakes that i've made. I din expect myself to study this hard. Its totally a different standard from A lvl. This whole study craze starts right from the start! where A lvl starts 1month before the exam!
Ytd manage to meet her and jw. I din expect her to follow us. I just want to pass her the present cause I don't have anyone to give and its for her from the start. We talked normally, act like nothing happens, but i know its not the same anymore. I hope she keeps a distance from me as im afraid i cant control, but at the same time, deep inside, I know I want her to accept me. And i were said for being insensitive. I admit I'm insensitive sometimes and I don like to sing praises to other people cause I think that we can still improve. I know all of us like to be praised but i just cant say out from my mouse. I've been trying to hold this skill but to no avail. After ytd, I think im affected by it. The expectation is still there. It shouldnt be after wad she did to me.. Its that part of my life that i wish to forget. Haiz. Maybe one day, just maybe, that she will know I've really give it my best. One thing that i think could have made a difference will be that night when i went to see her. I'm really bad at expressing myself and I know im not convincing enough. Lets fate decides then.. I'm tired of trying anyway and grasping any false hope. One last thing. I still like her..
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